Made her angry already. I cant find dinner partners. And i hate staying at home, shld have gone to work. Now mother doesnt plan to cook dinner already, and mei hua and dennis not free for dinner. Ytd say slack, then cos she tired, they having dinner jiu go home. Also can go her house and slack ma... No? She said she ends at 330, eat and then so early sleep a. Also cannot be. Maybe she meeting other pple, cos i boring maaaa. I think higher chances they are meeting someone. Ya maybe. I wont ask her out, i wait for her to ask me out, everytime last minute ask me out. Haiis, then i standby for her. Make no plans so when she asks me out then i will say yes, can. 

Dinner alone, dinner alone....... Haiis. Supposingly i tot having dinner with them. Slacking cancelled. They have dinner together then go over hui may house. And what was the initial plan? EVERYTHING CANCEL! They have dinner then head home? And what am i doing here?  No pple to go dinner with. Sitting under void deck and drink. YES SHE DID ASK TOGO TO HER HOUSE, but that was when i ask rachel whether she is free for drinks later. ITS ONLY WHEN I ASK. The other time she called me at nearly 11pm, she and rachel was slacking, she called me at 11pm to ask whether i wanto join or not. Isnt it VERY LAST MINUTE? there was one more occasion also like, she and rachel met up and slack already then ASKED ME, all so last minute. And yet she says that i always got plans. Is not that i got plans, its cos they are very last minute! I know myself, if its with her, i will be able to cancel everything just to hang out with her. But its when im already out with friends, then she asked. What am i ? Spare tyre? Some last minute friend? 

And now u asked me to go over ur house? When this afternoon u told me u are very tired and 14 days you have been working without any rest. And its only when i texted rachel, then u texted me. Well, thanks! Thanks for letting me have "dinner" alone, thanks for letting me have the feel to drink, thanks for letting me to feel lonely. THANKS. THANKS. 

Thanks to u, i really find that i love drinking so much.